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My Experience Having Sex for the First Time After Giving Birth



After having her baby, the author experienced pain during sex and brought up her concerns with her doctor during routine check-ins. Her doctor assured her that the pain was common and suggested using lube and getting tested if the pain persisted. The author’s husband was supportive and there was no pressure to have sex again, but when the mood struck, they tried using coconut oil as a lube which helped ease the pain.

Over time, the author’s nerves and anticipation of pain during sex started to dissipate after a few more attempts. Eventually, sex started to feel good again as their bodies synced and the pain decreased. However, restoring their sex life did not happen overnight. They had to navigate through a period of infrequent sex due to the demands of being a new parent and the physical toll of carrying and caring for a baby.

Physically, the author felt overwhelmed by the constant touch from her baby and the demands of caring for them, which made her feel “touched out”. The constant need to plan around the baby’s schedule and attending to their needs made it difficult to set aside time for herself, including engaging in sexual intimacy. The author found it challenging to shift her thinking away from the logical planning mindset that comes with being a new mom.

Despite the initial obstacles and challenges, the author and her husband eventually found their way back to a more regular and satisfying sex life. They were able to reconnect through spontaneous and frequent intimacy, exploring different positions and enjoying the physical and emotional connection. The journey back to a fulfilling sex life took time, patience, and open communication between the couple. The author’s experience highlights the importance of understanding and addressing the physical and emotional changes that come with becoming a parent and navigating the complexities of postpartum intimacy.

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