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7 Ways to Deal With the Emotional Blow of Losing Your Job

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Getting laid off can be brutal. Despite the fact that you shouldn’t take it personally—after all, most layoffs are a consequence of rocky economic times or cost-cutting efforts and not a reflection of your performance or work ethic—many people who lose their jobs find themselves questioning their professional value and self-worth. 

Layoff anxiety is no joke. Having a jobs—even a crummy one you’re desperately trying to move on from and forget about—often provides a sense of purpose and stability. Losing employment at a moment’s notice can completely upend your life and, of course, there’s also the sudden financial hit that may threaten your livelihood.

In other words, there are a bunch of factors that can make layoffs really hard on your mental health—including loss of income, status, daily structure, social support, and, for those who feel like their job defines them, self-esteem and identity. There’s also the inherent uncertainty and confusion that often comes with job hunting and mapping out your next move, Connie Wanberg, PhD, an organizational psychologist at the University of Minnesota’s Carlson School of Management, tells SELF. “Unemployment is a very stressful life event and not all people experience it the same way,” Dr. Wanberg says. 

If you’re here because you were recently laid off (or maybe someone you care about lost their job), there are a few ways to cope with the monumental stress and pressure, and hopefully start to feel at least a bit better about your sudden unemployment status. 

1. Acknowledge the loss and allow yourself to grieve.

Grieving is a natural part of healing from any type of loss, jobs included.  It’s common to experience typical reactions to grief—including denial, anger, and depression—after being laid off Linda Kim, MD, a psychiatrist and executive coach with the women-focused health care organization Moon Mental Health, tells SELF. Because any major loss is a lot to process, you might need a little time to acknowledge what happened and feel your feelings. Take a day, three days, two weeks—whatever you need or can realistically afford—to think about the job and how losing it made you feel, Dr. Kim suggests. Then, put a name to those feelings, whether it’s anxiety, anger, stress, shame, or embarrassment. This type of emotional reflection won’t immediately change your circumstances, she says, but labeling your specific feelings (as opposed to general descriptors like “awful” or “terrible”) has been shown to reduce stress and might eventually help you think more positively and clearly.

You may feel immediate pressure to kick off your job hunt and get back to work, but giving yourself some space to recover from the emotional hit can help ease the blow. “When possible, allow yourself a bit of a break, even if it’s only a day or two, to take a breath and focus on taking care of yourself,” Dr. Kim says. Taking a step back and doing some activities that bring you joy (like exploring nature or leaning into your creative side) can help you get out of your head and recover, she adds. 

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2. Try to create a new routine that feels good to you.

There’s no shame in using your time off to sleep in, binge the latest season of White Lotus, or get back into an old hobby, but adding some structure to your days, even if it’s just penciling in a few activities, can protect your well-being post-layoff. Routines can act as a buffer against stress while giving you the support you need to meet your daily goals, ultimately helping you stay on track to get a new job sooner, says Dr. Wanberg. In fact, research suggests that daily routines can help give life meaning, lower stress levels, regulate sleep, and improve mood.

Source: Self

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