Why I’m Staying Home for the Holidays Again

“What are you doing for the holidays?” Once upon a pre-pandemic time, this question seemed straightforward. But since I’m choosing to stay home for the holidays again this year, it hits me differently these days. Despite stricter vaccine mandates and relaxed COVID-19-related travel restrictions, in-person celebrations still feel a bit complicated. For one, there’s still a pandemic raging on. For two, I’m a brand-new mom.

Now when a friend or acquaintance asks me about my holiday plans, my mix of strong feelings—safety and pride from my commitment to abiding by CDC guidelines, but also sadness and isolation—makes it difficult to respond coherently, so I usually just say, “Probably staying home.” I then quickly ask about the questioner’s plans, hoping that I won’t have to explain why I’m spending the holidays at home: I have a new baby who can’t be vaccinated or wear a mask, so I’m not yet comfortable being around family and friends (yes, even when they’re vaccinated, and yes, even for the holidays).

I developed this diversion tactic for good reason. My previous attempts to state my reasoning for celebrating the holidays at home were often met with responses like: “You’re being too cautious,” “Babies don’t really get COVID,” and “Don’t you miss your family and friends?” Responding to these dismissive remarks, however well-intended, was emotionally draining, so I decided to start changing the subject—while reminding myself that it’s totally OK to not be ready to spend the holidays with loved ones in real life again this year, for any reason at all.

Everyone has the right to decide whether they’re comfortable with in-person holiday get-togethers, and I know that opting out of gatherings with people outside of my household again this year is the right choice for me and my family. We’re still in a deadly global pandemic—according to the CDC’s COVID-19 data tracker, nearly 800,000 people have died from the virus in the U.S. alone, as of December 15, 2021—and I want to stay vigilant to protect my little one, especially with the emergence of a new worrisome variant.

Yes, more people are getting the COVID-19 vaccine—as of December 15, 2021, 72% of eligible people living in America have received at least one dose, according to the CDC. But only 61% have had both doses (and just 27% of those folks have gotten a booster). So, while I commend the nearly two-thirds of eligible people in the U.S. who are fully vaccinated, I also find it terrifying, especially as a new mom, to know that roughly 40% have yet to receive the vaccine.

To make matters more concerning, the COVID-19 omicron variant has arrived just in time for the holiday season. The first U.S. case of the newest coronavirus strain (which sounds like a Marvel villain if you ask me) was reported in California, but the variant is now present in more than half of all states. Even though it’s seeming like omicron may be mild, the strain is still causing concern among experts, as SELF previously reported, because it’s potentially more transmissible than previous variants. As scientists are working around the clock to learn more about it, experts say our best line of defense is getting vaccinated and boosted. And since there are still millions of unvaccinated people in this country, and my baby isn’t eligible for the vaccine, I’m choosing not to travel to see family this year—or spend time indoors with nearby friends—so I can protect my little one against COVID-19 and a possibly even-more-contagious strain.